Monday, June 10, 2019

E3 2019, Day Two

We're back for more. Same format as before: the post goes up now, edited through the day as I watch the conferences and events with my comments. Maybe we'll have more moments like yesterday. I hope so. Even if we get little or nothing worth being excited for in terms of gaming, we'll have those to remember the year by. Commentary will be behind the cut. In the meantime, the Supreme Dark Lord has a post on something call "The Red Petition".

    PC Gaming Show
    • Day9 has a co-host, Frankie Ward, who's aping his schitck. Lovely.
    • Evil Genius 2. No gameplay. Just sizzle.
    • Vampire: The Masquerade 2. Time for woke shit. Q1 2020. Hard pass.
    • Some isometric space colonization game. Okay.
    • Chivalry 2. Okay.
    • Oh, Epic Game Store sponsors this? Not at all a desperation move.
    • Mosaic. Nice art show. No gameplay.
    • Midnight Ghost Hunt. 4v4 PVP game. Ghostbusters with a dick.
    • Unexplored 2. Like the original, but moreso. Okay.
    • Samsung shilling new monitor tech. If you have money to burn on marginal upgrades, okay.
    • Funcom segment. Mutant Year Zero: Seed of Evil. Okay.
    • Conan Unconquered, already out. Okay.
    • Moons of Madness. Okay.
    • Conan Chop Chop. Chibi Conan by way of Castle Crashers. Later this year.
    • Last Oasis. Premise is bullshit. Gameplay looks uninspired.
    • Age of Wonders: Planetfall. 4x Strategy. Should be good enough.
    • More Nazi Zombie bullshit. Fuck this. Rebellion, just stick to Sniper Elite games and skip these sideshows.
    • Remnant: From The Ashes. Four player post-apoc shooter game vs. Evil Tree Lovecraft shit.
    • Card game crap. Get off the stage.
    • Planet Zoo. If you like Planet Coaster, this should be your jam.
    • Yu Susuki? Okay, you have my attention.
    • Shenmue 3? Gameplay shown? November 19th this year! Epic Game Store? ON NO!
    • Songs of Conquest looks interesting.
    • More Vermintide 2. Versus Mode, ala playing the special Infected in Left 4 Dead. Beta coming.
    • Per Aspera. Colonizing Mars game. 2020.
    • Ancestors. Not that interested.
    • Epic Game Store shilling. With Auto Chess at the end.
    • CrisTales. Past, Present, Future simultaneously as gimmick. RPG. Demo now. 2020.
    • Valfarus. 2D sidescrollers not-40K game. Steam.
    • Borderlands 3. Still exclusive to Epic Store on PC. Snore.
    • Maneater. Not interested.
    • Chair shilling.
    • Terraria. You can find this on Steam, and I think GOG. New expansion coming.
    • Telling Lies, by the Her Story team. You get NSA video archive material--FMVs--and piece together the mystery. FFS, this shit gets done for real at places like Kiwifarms and it gets done faster. This fails to interest me.
    • Warframe. Expansion coming. This should be talked about on the Metro City Boys soon.
    • Genesis Noir. Set at the Big Bang. Gimmicky sizzle reel. Come back with gameplay.
    • El Hijo ("The Boy"), stealth game with Spaghetti Western vibes. Looks like it may not suck.
    • Balder's Gate 3 at the end. Game's based on D&D5e, with a tie-in official tabletop campaign as a prequel. No gameplay shown; sizzle trailer reveals mindflayers being in it. No release date given. And, we're done.
    Ubisoft
    • Remember that crack about live musical performances? Here we are. Sure, it's an Assassin's Creed symphonic suite, but still- GET ON WITH IT! You can shill for the concert series another time.
    • Watch Dogs Legion, set in a future London ruined by diversity yet--of course--has to be saved by it because Ubisoft Woke. You're an AI, you run agents that you play; that's the Roguelike element. Expect a shitshow and thinkpieces. 2020.
    • They drag out an actor to announce a TV show about making games. What the fuck is this bullshit? You just unsold this to me, morons.
    • Rainbow Six Siege update, by some fucking esport caster because he's cheap, with a gameplay sizzle reel. Way to not sell this.
    • Adventure Time in Brawlhalla. Snore.
    • Ghost Recon. Snore. More Terminator shit? Really?
    • Mobile game trash.
    • Just Dance. This is your queue to go use the toliet, get a drink, and stretch.
    • For Honor seasonal event. Spoopy stuff.
    • Rainbow Six Quarantine. More zombie shit. Infection mechanic. Leader is a hamplanet dangerhair. This is not going to be good.
    • Division 2. Expansion content overview with trailer on the final part. Tie-in movie via and with Netflix.
    • UPlay shilling. Nope.
    • Rollerball without the violence? Fuck off.
    • Still no Splinter Cell or Assassin's Creed.
    • Gods & Monsters. Next year. Adventure game. Lame send off. No big games from two pillar IPs. Lots of fail. Expected disappointment.
    Square Enix
    • They reminded the studio audience to shut their phones off. Good.
    • Start with the FF7 Remake. Good sizzle reel. Split between parts, Two BDs for Part 1 alone.
    • Gameplay demo by another guy explaining mechanics. Looks like it'll be fine.
    • Using the music for Advent Children is an obvious, but good, call. Playable at the SE booth.
    • Tifa has her glory. Aerith is as she should have been. I'm in.
    • Life Is Woke. SNORE. I'm living this "Muh Feels" shit. I don't need to play it.
    • Crystal Chronicles on Switch and PS4 (and mobile trash). Good.
    • Octopath Traveler on PC via Steam. Already out.
    • Last Remnant on Switch. Now.
    • DragonQuest Builders 2. Okay.
    • DragonQuest XI Definitive for Switch. Good.
    • Racing game. Not bad. Will check back to see if it sucks.
    • Battalion 1944. Okay.
    • KH3. I'm sorry for all of you with blueballs.
    • FF14: Shadowbringers. Yoshi P shows up to sell it, and own it. Take heed, Ion. THIS is how you rep your fucking game.
    • Dying Light 2, again. More sizzle showing gameplay. No firm date.
    • Two SaGa games for consoles and PC.
    • Brave Exvius and War of the Visions. Meh.
    • Outriders. Shooty post-apoc co-op game by folks who worked on Gears and Bulletstorm.
    • Oninaki. Okay.
    • FF8 Remaster. Someone's happy.
    • Avengers game. Not following the films, but Marvel signed off on it. Online co-op. Gameplay demo for those attending. May 15th next year.
    • Overall this was weak. Lots of okays and mehs. I like MMOs, so 14 is good for me. I'll be there for the 7 remake ASAP.

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