We will do anything to preserve our precious little egos.He uses space in an article about why pundits suck to talk about failure and how to deal with it. While he does go back to show how the quoted piece applies to the ways of political pundits, he ends on a conclusion that demonstrates the need for his useful note that anyone can do (and, of course, a plug for his book):
Think about the last time you saw a girl who made you stop. You didn’t approach because, “She’s a bitch.”
Whenever we refuse to take action, we find some reason to explain why the action would have been pointless. As Benjamin Franklin quipped, “So convenient a thing it is to be a reasonable creature, since it enables one to find or make a reason for everything one has a mind to do.”
Rather than say, “I’m being coward here and need to take action,” we say, “Oh well that idea would never work. It’s pointless to try it.”
That’s why you won’t quit your job, start a business on the side, or talk to beautiful women.
It’s not because the idea won’t work or that you don’t want to run business or that beautiful women aren’t wonderful.
It’s because your ego is terrified of being punched.
Change your mindset in these two ways only, your entire life will change.He's right. Making those two changes will improve your life, as they directly attack the biggest problem most have with failure: the ability to afford to fail at all. (And yes, these two shifts will also allow you to handle the material aspect better.)
- Accept mistakes as opportunities for growth.
- Refuse to define your identity based around your lowest points.
I am surprised as how much less stress I have since I stopped flipping tables over this stuff. It harmonizes with another truism: "Pros fail more than amateurs ever attempt." This is why "fail faster" is a thing; the successful attempt more, fail more, learn more from failure, recover faster, and try again- and they do so faster and faster and faster with less and less effort over time. The conclusion, therefore, is this: Perfection is a Result of Revision.